Distant Witnesses
At the end of January 2021, my husband our dog and I moved from Oakland, California to Portugal. For the last three months we have been living in Coimbra, the ancient capital, where my ancestors lie buried. This city is also home to the country’s largest university, though until recently, you wouldn’t have noticed this as all students were either at home with their families, taking part in distance learning, or were staying indoors all day, as the state of emergency dictated by the government required. It was surprising to us to arrive here and see that everyone in the street, in the grocery stores and post office was wearing a mask. It was also shocking to us to feel we were in a near ghost town, as everyone was truly following the pandemic mandates and staying home. Portugal is now reopening, slowly, as new cases, hospitalizations and deaths from COVID continue to drop.
Coming from the heavily propagandized and overly politicized United States, all of this has been novel to us, especially the willingness of a population to work together to bring down infection rates and adhere to common sense guidelines. As we enter our forth month of life as expatriates, we are increasingly horrified by what we see in the US — the continued erosion of voting rights, while war on LGBT people, immigrants, the environment, mask mandates, vaccinations and critical thought continue to escalate. That the extremist right-wing is not countered by a robust left is more and more obvious, as is the inability of the Democratic Party to in any way counter or stand up to the lunacy of the conspiracy theory driven right. Seeing Democratic Governors and Mayors end mask mandates out of deference to extremism is as depressing and concerning as the extremism itself. The incessant propaganda, misinformation and conspiracy theories that permeate American discourse seem even more insane now than they did to us while living in the US — the mass shootings, deportations, children languishing in cages at the Mexican border and blind patriotism even more heartbreaking.
While we knew we would experience many emotions as we began our expatriate life, nothing could have prepared us for how much more terrifying the country we come from would come to seem in so short a time. In a period of four months in which we have not feared being shot at the grocery store, and have not heard every aspect of life in our new home country spun into conspiracy theory, we have come to feel even more horrified by the hubris and violence of the US than we did while living within it. The thought now of ever returning is one that fills us with cold panic. How could we possibly return to so angry, so isolated, so violent and unthinking a society? Is it just us, or are there more shootings now than there were before? If the Democrats demand votes to “counter” the Republicans but only capitulate when in power, who will ever turn the tides of what can only be seen as rising support for fascism?
No country is perfect, just as no person is perfect. Some places are, however safer. For now, knowing that we live in a country enacting policies directed at combatting climate change. We are fine to continue wearing masks until the entire country has been vaccinated and shows true herd immunity. For now, we are happy to live in a place where debate is allowed to happen without the expectation of capitulation to the loudest, most volatile elements on the political stage — qualities considered by and large dangerous and untrustworthy.